Private Strategy Retainer · By Application
You lead in a boardroom, a ministry, or a home. You’ve already woken up to the control. What you need now is someone in your corner between sessions, not just during them.
Limited to six clients at a time.
Narcissist. Covert. Whatever word is trending this week.
Great. Now what?
You still have a board meeting on Thursday. You still have the text you’ve rewritten eleven times and haven’t sent. You still have the pastor who thinks “pray about it” is a strategy. A label tells you, potentially, what you’re dealing with. It doesn’t tell you what to DO on Thursday.
Everyone else will tell you what he is.
I help you decide who you are.
I’m Sharmen Kimbrough, an Identity Strategist, and your strategist on retainer: a consultant to women who lead. I don’t hand you a label. I hand you language, footing, and a strategy, so you can show up well in your story while it’s still being written.
It’s not the right fit yet if you’re in immediate danger, or you’re just beginning to see what’s been happening. Start with a Jumpstart or an Identity Recovery Group. That’s the right foundation, and the retainer will be here when you’re ready.
You stop asking, “Am I allowed to?” and start asking, “What am I building?”
You know where you stand before you walk in the room.
You get words that say what YOU mean, not what keeps the peace.
You make them on your timeline, not his.
Life is not about waiting to see if he changes. Living is the point of the story.
The signature
You’ve rewritten that email eleven times. Send it to me first, whether it’s going to your husband, your attorney, your board, or your pastor. I’ll hear what it’s actually saying underneath and hand you back one that says what you mean. You’ll have it within one business day.
Your standing weekly slot, 50 minutes, held for you.
Voice or text, Monday through Thursday, answered within one business day. When real life happens on a Tuesday afternoon, you don’t have to wait until next week to think it through.
Twenty minutes, once a month, right before the hard moment.
Ninety minutes, plus a one-page Strategy Brief: where you are, what you’ve decided, and the next 90 days, in writing.
First notice of retreats, and preferred rates on intensives.
She runs a successful business. She also runs a home with three kids, one of them in specialized medical treatment. Her husband has a high-profile job, and his idea of partnership is simple: he pays for it, she manages it. He’ll do what he’s asked. He won’t carry any of the thinking.
She handed me the sentence she’d been saying for years: “I can’t get him to see how he’s failing me.”
Here’s what that sentence is actually doing. It hands him the keys. Her peace is on hold until he “sees it.” And every time she explains it again, she’s managing him too, on top of everything else.
Getting him to change is a losing strategy. Losing herself is worse. So I handed her back a different sentence:
“I don’t need him to see it. I get to choose how deeply I engage with what he’s actually offering.”
That isn’t giving up on him. It’s refusing to give up on herself. She stops auditioning for his understanding and starts choosing, eyes open, where to invest and where not to. The marriage is part of her life. It isn’t her identity.
A husband I was coaching was getting ready for a hard conversation with his team. His draft opened with: “If you put your mind to it, you could succeed.”
He believed that was motivation. Most of us were raised on it: aim a little shame at people and they’ll rise to meet it.
So I asked him what that sentence actually says underneath. “If you put your mind to it” means you haven’t. “You could” or “If you wanted to” means you don’t. He meant it as a door. It lands as a verdict: whatever you’ve already given, with whatever you had to work with, it wasn’t enough.
That’s the trap of “If… you would…” It erases how hard someone has already tried. And it’s the same structure as “If you loved me, you would…” Different room. Same hook.
We rewrote it:
“You can do this. Here’s where we’re going. Show me what you got.”
It stopped him in his tracks. Same goal. Completely different room. That’s what “Send me the sentence” does, in the boardroom, at the kitchen table, and everywhere in between.
This isn’t open-ended talk. The first season has a shape.
Month 1
We get clear on what this season of your life is actually for, and write it down.
Month 2
We prepare for the conversation you’ve been avoiding, and we decide what you will and won’t carry anymore.
Month 3
We review what’s changed and what you’ve decided. You leave with your one-page Strategy Brief for the next 90 days.
By day 90, you will have had at least one conversation you’d been putting off, and you’ll have the language for the next one.
For couples
Some couples are past the crisis and doing the real work. They want a strategist in the room while they rebuild how they talk, decide, and repair. The couples retainer has the same seat and the same rhythm:
Couples begin with a Relational Reset, the three-hour starting point that includes an individual hour with each of you. When emotional, verbal, spiritual, or coercive control has been present, I will recommend individual work first. That’s not a door closing. It’s the right order.
One private 50-minute session each month for each partner, plus a private messaging thread for each of you. Anything you tell me alone stays in its own vault.
+$400 per month
1
A short application, about ten minutes. I read every one myself.
2
New to working with me? Individuals begin with a Jumpstart, and couples with a Relational Reset. That way we both know this is the right fit.
3
Twenty minutes to make sure the retainer is the right tool.
4
You get your standing slot, and we set up messaging in the way that is safest for you.
Investment
$1,500 per month
Three-month minimum, then month to month. Or pay $4,200 per quarter, in full.
The same rate applies to individuals and couples.
Seats are limited to six clients at a time, so each one gets my full attention. You can pause for up to one month a year for travel or life, and your seat is held while you’re away.
I know what it means when someone else reads the email or checks the phone. We’ll choose a messaging app you can secure, and I’ll reach you only the way you tell me is safe. My disclosure explains exactly how I protect your information.
Can I do this from anywhere?
Yes. Sessions are virtual, and I work with clients across time zones.
What if I travel a lot?
Good. So do I. Reschedule with 24 hours’ notice, or pause for up to a month a year.
I’ve never worked with you. Can I apply?
Yes. If you’re a fit, we’ll start with a Jumpstart, or a Relational Reset for couples.
Is this faith-based?
Yes. My faith is the root of my work, and I will never use it as a weapon against you. You don’t have to share it to work with me.
Is this for couples?
Yes. The couples retainer has the same rate and rhythm, and it begins with a Relational Reset.
Do you work with men?
Yes, by application. Most of the people I work with are women, but if you’re a man who has woken up to control and wants a strategist, apply.
Is it confidential?
Yes, within the limits explained in my disclosure.
Let’s build it.
No labels. Just strategy, together.
Most applications ask how much you make. This one asks what’s at stake.