Recovering Your Identity After Escaping Codependency and Abuse

We cannot get through life unscathed by trauma. Yet, we often let trauma dominate our lives through denial, avoidance, fear, or naivete. Undealt with, trauma isolates us and leads to self-protection, manifesting as codependence or narcissism. Both extremes involve hiding oneself to manage the world around them. As natural nurturers, most women tend to lean toward codependency.

It’s a Lonely Road Alone

Having been mentored through some bottom-of-the-pit seasons of my own life, I’ve realized how powerful it is to have someone in my corner, encouraging, stretching, pushing, and holding me accountable to follow through with the hard steps I knew I needed to take.

Driven by the Feelings You Choose

Most of the time, we let feelings drive our behavior like mindless fools, not realizing we’ve given away our own power to enjoy the moments for what they are. We make a meaning and attribute a motive to what we think we see, and that becomes the “perception” that fuels our feelings.  Those feelings become the motivation and direction of our responses.  

The Perturbed Heart Part 2

 If God is after your integrity, and He uses the people around you to soften the edges and knock out the junk, how do you navigate the toxicity without getting burned? Here’s how to embrace growth within relationships.

The Perturbed Heart, Part 1

Consider the inner chaos you are experiencing connected to another person or people. Whatever feelings they provoke in you, that’s what God is after. The closer the relationship, the deeper the emotional impact. These feelings reflect the deeper issues of your heart—your insecurities, fears, desires, and your ability to connect and love. It’s within this space that God wants to transform your life.

Running the Race

There’s just something indescribably great reaped into the heart through a journey of pain and perseverance. Something not grasped or understood through any other means. The “win” isn’t the crowds response, it’s in the consistent training done along the way.